Trust and faith

It was really good to meet with God on sunday and gained that fresh hope and feeling like my burden is being lifted up. That message on sunday was very much for me and targeted at my situation. So thank you for giving me the courage to go down and seek prayer. and thanks for the lady who did pray for me , who was spot on about the situation. I still pray for a miracle, regardless of its kind. I will seek You, seek your kingdom, seek your love and seek to learn to trust You first before everything else.
I pray for directions and I pray that I will learn to seek You before man.


I pray i will have a good sleep tonight.

All will be for the better. And i have this tiny wee bit crush on this boy.
hahaha.. been making the days better.


Night.

Rough Patch

So, I think it might be final that i aint getting it. When I first got the news, i sat at my desk and was extremely overwhelmed. I did not know what to do, i just knew i had to breathe. I counted ten, typed some random work and stood up went to the washroom, closed the cubicle and cried. I felt my entire body cringed at the resounding news and I did not know how to behave. Logically my mind kept reminding me all the politically correct things regarding the situation , about how if God closes one door, He's going to open another, dont lose faith, keep praying. With God, dream big, surrender it to Him and let Him deal with it. Yeah I know all these, I also trust in all of these. Though my emotions at that point of time was uncontrollable. At this very moment, I am still feeling really low and disappointed with myself. Though I am in a better composed self. I am a bit cynic and snappy , largely finding my cave and hide. Cringing whenever i scroll past the official email. My entire being gets the goosebumps , and it's not the good kind of goosebumps. Everything fit, coincidences and chances, random surprises and all, it fit. Yet, the outcome is not ideal at this point of time, though, with God.. you need to trust. You might not understand why He does not give you some of the things you pray so hard for but you need to trust that He knows whats best for you better then you. I promise I am only going to be sappy till Monday and then i'll recover. Really need to start planning a way out or a better way because the brim is here. Gotta pray cause very lost right now. Still pray for that tiny hope that I'll get another email for acceptance. It could happen, with God it could. Especially when it felt really right, though it might just be my own emotions crowding up my judgement. But yes, I will still pray about it, hoping for the impossible. It will only , it can only, come with Him and Him alone.


Having the muster seed of faith and hope, I hence lift up my load to You Oh Lord, please take them and I pray, for now, that someone will reject it and somehow or rather, it will be given to yours truly. Believing in miracles, why pray? because in a second, God can do all things I cannot do even if I spend my entire life trying. There is no harm in believing and praying for the best. Whichever it is, i know it is for the best. As much as the enemy is shouting and trying to put negative thoughts in my mind, i will only turn and look to God. Just 2 - 3 days of sappiness, I'll be alright. Disappointments, I'll feel all these negativity emotions and I will turn it all around and make it work for me.


So I pray, for good or better, a path that You laid out for me, I will be able to identify it and walk in it.
Faith & Hope .
And I pray God, you, heal my wound and take away all these negativity thoughts, for I am made in the image of You.
Nothing less, nothing more.


And thank you Lord for the people who been there and who have been extremely supportive. Specific people you placed in my life to support me. I thank You so much for them.

Amen.

Life is short. very short.

To Dominique Lee.

For a person that I hardly know but heard of alot , for a person that means alot , means the world to many of the people I care about. For your family and for everyone that loves you.

I pray, you are safe in God's hand.

// So. Just heard that one of a friend passed on. Nah we are not tight, definitely really havent spoken to him, perhaps glances and a simple hi. but darn, its close enough with about a great number of my mates being affected by this. it serves a very very important reminder about how simple life can be just here and then gone. So do not take for granted every morning when you wake up, every night when you go to bed. Because, you been blessed with another day. I'm not saying to live life and totally ignore consequences, live it in such a way that you know what matters to do what does not and you keep working towards it. Ignore the rest, cause seriously, it will all come to pass. Set out goals, set out foot prints, strive and keep striving, keep trying. No sweeties, no one wakes up thinking it's their last day. No one, so please do cherish every breathe.

~ God bless his family and his loved ones for he has played a huge part in those people's life.

Amen.

my baby sister.

Happy 16th birthday my sweet baby.

Sure hope you had a good time and that you enjoyed the surprise.

//

digress a bit,nostalgic much , couldnt help myself but to pop by today. i guess, i wanted to reassure myself that i am awesome and u see that i am awesome and that i am always the bigger person. i might complain about that but i enjoy being the bigger person. was nostalgic the entire day, got home, changed into one of the shirts.. went to read some old posts and gosh. hahahaha … i really think i "forgotten" all the bad parts and store in somewhere not reachable? so reading back was a bit difficult cause mmm, reminded me how far i strayed off and how unhealthy it was.though for what its worth, i was genuinely happy for a while. so that i am happy about.. beside that… i am thankful i did go thru that though it was very painful at that point of time. always a nice memory ..

//

also glad i have grown. gosh, was insanely retard in some older posts. that was funny but wildly disturbing. i judged myself hahahaha.

goodnight.

Matthew 6v19-33

For a long time I have been reaching out, maybe not as much as I should have but I have been. This morning while riding the train to work, after maybe conscious effort of listening to Praise FM in the morning and the night when I sleep has slowly tuned me a bit more towards God.

Well, I am now currently anxiously waiting for a response for something that I feel is good for me and my direction. I envisioned how things will be like for me this entire year and a favorable response to that question will please me alot. Very anxious and nervous but God is showing me how to trust and to understand that hey… no matter which direction the answer is heading towards, I will be okay. What is so amazing about this God of mine is that He communicates with me in his own subtle ways. So…. while riding the train this morning listening to some family workshop on Praise FM, God suddenly imprinted Matthew 6v24 to be exact into my heart. And Having the awesome iphone, i immediately browsed for the verse.

" No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other,or he will be devoted to the one and despite the other. You cannot serve both God and Money. " I reckon this is God's way of reminding me why I do what I do, why I make some decisions, that to always make sure the reasons behind these acts remains faithful and in tune with His ways. I am human, but He, He is God. And through Him, I can always try.

So then He prompted me to read from Matthew 6v19.. all the way to Matthew 6v33..

So what spoke most to me next was.. Matthew 6v25, "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you eat or rink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important then clothes? Look at the birds of the air: they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

v28 " And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies in the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you? O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying " What shall we eat" or "What shall we drink? or "What shall we wear?" For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavently Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

I was immediately calmed and … reminded of how much He loves us. Who am I to say He will love me any much lesser because of my wrongful doings that are human errors? But thank God for being merciful. Well, I trust Him with that decision and I lift it up onto Him. And I thank Him for reminding me all these lessons and humbling myself again.

Amen, thank You for loving me.

Our amazing God.

God's favour never cease to amaze me.

Expectancy is the seedbed for miracles to happen

1.speak to things on behalf of God
(Telling your problems howww Big our God is)

2. Speak to God on behalf of things.
(He is our best listener, always faithful)

Mountain moving faith -

Then, we not only know what He has said, we will then experience the
faithfulness in fulfilling it .

Amen

I am very thankful God, thankful for the doors and opportunities. I trust in You no matter what the results are because I know You know what is the best for me.

<3

The Black Keys - Too afraid to Love.

My gears they grind
More each day
And I feel like
They're gonna grind away

And the city blocks
They drive me wild
They're never ending
Mile after mile

I just don't know what to do
I'm too afraid to love you

It's heaven on earth
In her embrace
Her gentle touch
And her smiling face

I'm just one wishing
That I was a pair
With someone
Oh somewhere

All those sleepless nights
And all those wasted days
I wish loneliness would leave me
But I think he's here to stay
What more can I do
I'm wringing myself dry
And I can't afford to lose
One more teardrop from my eye

why you act all so nonchalant for a intention i do not comprehend.

// upset with you.

// praying for that prog , praying my dream will never come true , praying He oh so merciful , will bring salvation to mumsy , praying safety , praying for comfort, praying for you.

xx

DEATH CAB FOR CUTIE TOMORROW.

WOOOOOOO.