a break , a well deserved break.

i am finally taking the weekend off, finally finally finally.

no reception on my phone, the sea breeze, the bright bright sun, clear blue waters, running the tracks , reads , time spent with my family, myself.. and finally.. SLEEP.

I cannot wait. i need this.

Work been rewarding but i need sleep.

Life lately has been quite colorful i must say, exciting even.

Realizations and reminders of why certain decisions was made in the first place,

enjoying some high life.. esp this week. hahaha

oh wells..

and i realize, as we get older we hardly talk to our besties as much.. or even consult them about certain decisions we are gg to make. i think.. i guess.. we just assume we know best.. mmm what happened to those late night talks, staying up late trying to figure things out together? OH wells.....

i got issues. sigh.

(: more more next time, soon.

Gotta sleep. Love

Someone like you.

"Someone Like You"

I heard
That you're settled down
That you
Found a girl
And you're
Married now

I heard
That your dreams came true.
Guess she gave you things
I didn't give to you

Old friend
Why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back
Or hide from the light

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me," I begged
"I'll remember," you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead."
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead,
Yeah.

You know how the time flies
Only yesterday
It was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise
Of our glory days

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over.

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me," I begged
"I'll remember," you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead."

Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made.
Who would have known
How bittersweet this would taste?

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me," I begged
"I'll remember," you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead"

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me," I begged
"I'll remember," you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead"

Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead

Long week ahead!

Goodnight,

~ I wish i could just focus, focus just on one. Just let go of all the barriers and just go for it. Regardless of the consequences.

I wish.

Take control.

I do not know how to ask for more. And im worried about all the rules i used before to keep myself in check, now they have become thick thick unbreakable walls. How am i ever going to live with all these rules in place? All the yadadadada.. Maybe making a mistake, breaking out first, is the way out.. Too deep in.. Feel like i missed out far too much and. I will keep missing out.

There are many reasons why i love work, but one of the main reason is that, i feel more in control of whats going to happen, a certain amount of hard work, a certain amount of presence , will get you somewhere , for sure or somewhat. I like to know whats going to happen, i like to know the plans, i like to know where is something heading too, i like to know that by putting in this much effort, what the results will be. I wish i was more spontaneous .

God, i pray for a good week ahead, got a feeling it might be a wee bit tough. I hope i dont choke up with emotions.

Goodnight.

xx

To Marilyn Monroe.

superpaksiw:

theequirkyromantic:

Do you know who that picture is of? That’s Marilyn Monroe. They’ve considered her the most beautiful women in the world. She’s gorgeous, and beautiful, right? But look at her stomach. Is it completely flat? Does she not have love handles or, perfect long skinny legs? No. She doesn’t. And wanna know something? Her pants size, was a size 9. She wasn’t some fucking 00 or 1. She had CURVES. You all worry about your pants size, and your weight when, in reality, who cares? Why not live your life and be happy instead of counting calories in your head? Trying to “Be skinny”? You think losing weight is going to automatically make you feel better? It won’t. No magical fairy is gonna come flying outta fucking wood work, declaring, “You’re now officially hot! Boys love you now! You can be accepted by society!” No. Utter, bullshit. You’re fucking beautiful; it’s society that’s fucked. Love yourself, because if you cant love yourself, you can’t love anybody, or anything else. Be free, and be happy. Fuck what the media says, you want that double cheese-burger with bacon? GO FOR IT. Until your weight starts to affect your health, you’re perfectly fine to eat what you please. ♥

BE NATURAL. THAT’S ALL IT IS.

(via porsheohporshe)

~ I think its important to know whats the definition of beauty is and first & foremost, love yourself. Find someone that loves you thru thick and thin, wants only the best for you, flaunt you around cause he's happy you're his girl not cause your a trophy. Go easy on yourself girls, never settle for less, never be second best, never be the second choice. Dont be that girl sitting around waiting for something to happen, off you go, go make it happen. Happiness isnt something that just falls into your lap, its a choice that can only be made by you. Find someone that loves you right.

Goodnight.

sweet cheeks

i am finally 21. i am so tired from the awesome weekend. i need to sleep first then process this entire trip. i am very blessed and loved. so glad everyone had fun, gotta sleep, gotta be super woman tomorrow at 6.30am again. nighty

~ i still think you & i could make something out of it, at least a step forward to be friends.

so glad we are speaking again.

nighty.

l'esprit de escalier

Get a grip.

quit being impulsive.

God, cut it away and help me toss it away.

Its not impossible to walk on.

deserves so much more.

but isnt that what everyone says?

even people who dont?

someday someone will sing a lovely song to me.

Goodnight.

Barely a week away.

~ yeah, remember that, opportunity comes, grab it.

Its like when it comes to you, my entire life, being, mindset, dreams , theories deserts me. It's as though, its two different person. One that knows what she wants, what she deserve, what she needs , with tons of dreams that needs to be fulfilled, working slowly but surely towards it. The other pretty much shelf all of that up and is so delusional, its difficult to believe. I'm turning 21 in barely days , with tons going on for me, working , my family , my friends , parties , sports, gym , i look good enough for myself, sometimes i forget im all that & so much more and still believe im nothing, like when i was 17..

maybe cause you had me when i was nothing, left me when i was nothing.

I cannot wait.. i worry about this saturday but i would love for it to come & really have a good good time surrounded by most of my love ones.

Worked so hard in the gym, i miss the gym, heart pumping enough for me to clear my brain, punching all the stress away , i know i am gg to wake up with a ache..... but. love it.

Goodnight, 5 freaking more days.

I'm scare.. but excited.

(:

xx